If not for them there would be no us....

Remembrance day is fast approaching. What will you do? Will you spend some time reflecting? Does it mean anything to you at all? I was brought up in a culture where we honoured Remembrance day with a true day of honour. We had a day off school, the businesses were closed, the banks were shut down and everybody went to the celebrations. Then when I had children it was different....the schools were open but the kids honoured and reflected and stood quiet for a minute at 11am. Now, it's just another day to some people. A generation has grown up hardly knowing what it is we who are older understand. And my generation is losing our parents and grand parents who fought in the Great War for which Remembrance Day was created.

That got me thinking. I had dinner with a great bunch of ladies tonight. It's a networking group I belong to called the Company of Women. There are at least 150 members and the feeling is that of just going home when we get together. We all catch up and talk about families and life and then, work, if there is time. But the relationships are created and the connections are made and people do work together.

I sat at a table with a lovely group of women. One of them was telling me about her family and Remembrance Day. The town she lives in now is the town she grew up in. It was farm country then...The farms are long gone, the families spread around the globe or further. My friend told me about a monument that was created for the people who fought in the Great War who had come from her town. She was asked if she knew anybody who might have had some connections to this monument, whose name should be included....

Her family...her very own family had been involved. He had been a pilot. He had fought and he had come home. His name went on the monument. She went to see it etched in the stonework. She cried. She didn't know she would feel like that but it was ok. When she told us the story I wanted to cry too. There is something about the honouring of those who have done great work for others that is worthy of remembering. A monument, a letter, a song, a poem...whatever it takes.

Then I realized something else as the evening passed and the laughter intensified. Were it not for him I would not have met her. Had her relative not faced his fears to protect what he thought was precious we would probably not have met. The world would have been different. We wouldn't have shared our little chuckles together, admired each other's little bits of shiny jewels on our wrists, told stories of our aging dogs and our traveling children.

Honour those who have gone before. Were it not for them facing their fears we would not be here now to face ours. As for us....face your fears with courage and conviction and know that it is right. It will be hard, it will be messy and, I promise you, things will never be the same afterwards.

To all who go before me...my gratitude. To the families who have lost loved ones, I honour you and your sacrifice and am grateful for the freedoms offered up by those you love. When Novemeber 11 arrives take a few minutes to give thanks. It's a small sacrifice compared to what others have done for us.

Living la vida fearless, Jan

Energy Crisis

The price of oil has escalated this year due, in part, to the erratic weather patterns and hurricanes hitting the US eastern coastal cities. Many people are feeling the pinch as they speculate what their heating costs will be this winter. Some will be faced with difficult choices...do we eat this week or do we heat the house? That got me thinking about another energy crisis we are all facing in this world. It's a personal energy crisis. People are just worn out. They are tired, they are scared, they are hungry and unwell. What is going on? I have a few thoughts on this crisis of energy consumption but I would really love to hear from other people on this issue.
What energizes you? What causes you to feel powerFULL? Are you fully engaged in this activity now? If not...Why aren't you doing it? What's stopping you?
We hear so much about the industrial energy crisis but what about our own personal energy crises?
Anybody willing to step up and put their thoughts out? Let's start a power revolution folks and take back our energy. Living la vida fearless, Jan

Rosa Parks

The world lost a great leader last week. Rosa Parks was 92 when she passed away. When she was about 40 years old, working as a seamstress in Montgomery, Alabama she had no idea her life would change the face of civil rights in the United States.

You see, Ms. Parks was tired the day she finished her work and, when she boarded the city bus she was lucky to have found a seat. However, during the ride a white man also boarded the bus and the rules of public transit at that time were that she was to give up her seat to a white person.

Well, Rosa Parks refused and in so doing, put her life on the line. She could have, at best, been arrested, at worst been seriously hurt or even killed. It was just not done back then. A black person did not refuse the request of a white person...until Rosa Parks.

Were it not for the fearless stand that Rosa Parks took that day there may not have been another fearless leader borne out of this injustice. There may never have been the words, "I have a dream." That man, of course, was Martin Luther King. Reverend King says that it was because of the injustice toward Ms. Parks and the segregation laws, that he became involved in the civil rights movement.

She faced her fears. She would not back down. She was arrested and fined and had to pay the large sum of $10.00 in fines, a princely sum for a poor black seamstress from Montgomery, Alabama.

"She sat down in order that we might stand up," the Rev. Jesse Jackson said.

In speaking of the issue in her later years Rosa Parks explained that she was "tired of being humiliated, of having to adapt to the byzantine rules, some codified as law and others passed on as tradition, that reinforced the position of blacks as something less than full human beings."

Her long time friend Elaine Steele says, "She was in her forties, she was not a child. There comes a point where you say: No, I'm a full citizen too. This is not the way I should be treated.

Rosa Parks could not have known the impact she would make upon the world by choosing to face her own fears and trust her truth. We are all better for it.

Blessings to Ms. Parks and all her followers.

Today was a stunningly beautiful day in my neck of the woods...or suburbs. It's one of those rare sunny, warm days that we just know will be long gone in a few weeks as winter begins to set in. So, I took my old dog out for a walk to enjoy and savour the day. I live in a family neighbourhood and we back onto a park and, since it was Sunday, I figured there would be lots of people out and about on such a gorgeous day. Wrong! I saw only two other people the whole time I was out. I passed the park remembering the times I would take my own two children there and saw empty swings and empty climbing stuff and empty sand pits. I have to admit I was really shocked by the fact that there were no kids outside at all. It was only 2 in the afternoon...where was everybody? Then I saw a kid walking by with a Nintendo game in his hand. That got me thinking about life in our world these days. It's ok to stay inside and play interactive games on the computer but it's not ok to be outside and interact with other kids or nature. Parents are so afraid of something happening to their kids that it is probably easier to just keep them inside. At least they are nearby then. What happened to the notion of spending time together? Of going out for a walk? Of playing in the park? What's wrong with a kid hopping on a bike and going to ride around with a bunch of friends for an hour or two? What is everybody so afraid of? Geez...we are the first generation of North American's to have obesity count as a major disease among young people. Diabetes, depression and many other serious health issues are directly related to a lack of exercise and poor food choices. When I was a kid I could wander my neighbourhood with my friends. I could ride a bike. I could play in the park. When my kids were little they could do the same. Were my parents or my husband and I being irresponsible? Were we bad parents? Of course not. We faced our fears of what might, could, may...happen to the kids and then moved on. We asked them to come home once in a while to check in, to phone us if they went to somebody's house and we were often the house of choice for many of the kids to come to. We would take the kids out to the park, to the beach, to the lake...to play soccer or baseball or football...to pick apples or just walk the dog. Were my kids unsafe? Maybe, maybe not. We did all we could to protect them and then we let them just go out and be kids. The media has taught, and many have accepted as fact, the notion that the world is a fearful place. It's not safe. It's dangerous. The price we are paying is costly. People who don't know how to be by themselves, people who don't know how to be socially interactive, people who don't know how to play. People who are so afraid of doing anything that doing nothing is a better choice! Come on folks...face your fears. Let the kids play. If you're not comfortable with them being alone go with them! Living la vida fearless, Jan

Today I watched the Oprah show. She was featuring the author James Frey, who has penned the book A Million Little Pieces. It's a book about truth and deceit and rage and fury. Mr. Frey tells his own true story about living a life as a drug and alcohol addict and how he finally overcame his addictions. It's a very touching and provocative and emotional book. His message to people who are going through the pain and the despair he went through...."Hold on. Just hold on. " Things will get better if you just hold on. He also talked about facing our fears. If we don't face our fears we hide them...through drugs, alcohol, overeating, over achieving, under achieving....whatever the venue the bottom line is that you have to face your fears to live an authentic life. I loved that about his comments. Facing his fears, putting his story on the line, into the lime light, has opened the door for so many other people to now do the same thing. Others in the same position can now see that they are not alone, that this is not the only time such a thing has happened to a person. Mr. Frey has reached out to a million little people by writing this book. The repurcussions of recovery are far reaching as addiction touches more than just the person that is addicted. Read this book and then question yourSELF. Are you facing your fears? If not, why not? Living la vida fearless, Jan www.tobeyourbest.net